It may come as a surprise to you, but the question that I’m asked most often by audiophiles is “What is the penguin’s favourite biscuit?”
Now as you will know, there are actually more breeds of penguin than there are varieties of biscuit, so my reply has to be penguin-specific, and in particular has to refer to the cheeky little rockhopper – the one with the orange feathers on the side of his head. Here he is if you’ve not seen one before:
Now I’ve done tests with real penguins to answer this question, and those tests came out slightly in favour of Bourbon biscuits, which would make sense when you realise that this little chap has a gene dictating a liking for chocolate.
but for the result to be statistically significant I thought that a computer simulation would be essential. Naturally, I wrote the simulator in Ruby on Rails, which is the famous Stephen Hawkin’s preferred simulator language, and having run in double blind mode, I can officially declare that the rockhopper’s real biscuit of preference is the Garibaldi.
This puzzled the team at first, but then one of the them pointed out that in the wild a large part of the little chap’s diet is the Antarctic ant, which it never gets while in the zoo environment, and because it is short-sighted, the rockhopper mistakes the currants in the biscuit for these ants!
So there you have it, when anyone next asks you the question, you have the answer ready. Well done.